excerpts of my life

From The Heart

2006-01-22T21:21:00.000-05:00

when i think of love, i think of you.
your love has captured my heart
and inspired me to be better.
you deserve the best because
of who you are.
i've experienced your love and have known
your beauty inside and out.

you're real and true.
you're down to earth and love to have fun.
you make me laugh,
and encourage me.
you make fun of yourself,
and bring tears of joy to me.

i love the kodak moments we make,
and how we look back and cherish them.
you're always right,
and i'm always wrong.
you guide me when im lost,
and there when i need you.

late night talks, hourly long calls,
massive msn convos, it's easy to see
that i can't get enough of you.

thank you for letting me share
my wants, my needs, my passions,
my dreams and my hopes.

thank you for listening,
even at times when you don't want to.
thank you for forgiving me,
even though i don't deserve it.
thank you for showing me true love.
thank you for accepting my flaws.
thank you for being who you are.

words cannot express how special you are.
you're beautiful no matter what they say.
you're everything to me.

i love you s2

2006

2006-01-04T00:57:00.000-05:00

happy new year everyone. wow, 365 days have past and another 365 days to look forward/dread. i think this year will be a defining moment in my life for sure. graduating/failing, improve/injure friendships, getting fatter/fitter. that's alot of uncertainty. thankful that God is never changing and never unfailing, although at times it seems like He's just left us alone or messing around with our lives on purpose. well it's that time again, to make this year's 06 resolution.

1. continue to improve working habits to get into waterloo co-op
2. go to gym keep fit. SO I WONT LOOK LIKE WHAT JEN PREDICTED
3. don't lose touch with friends
4. eat healthy and avoid sieu yai
5. don't ignore God
6. enjoy life by taking the good with the bad

i'm sure there's more but wtv. thanks to everyone who's shared great memories in 05. prob didn't get to chill with everyone that i want to, but thanks for making my boring days fun, random events, sad days happy, happy days happier, stressed days funny, and plenty of chillout nights. shoutouts to pca: KK TW SL JC DC RA MK CH DG LL AL NR RW KH LL HL HL(lang leui) JW SL(sexy) AY JH others: ST LL JS KC(mui) AT RT IC DC KC SL DW AG AM MH SL VW

music mood..

2005-11-03T02:58:00.000-05:00

Simple Plan - I'd Do Anything
s2

Another day, is going by
I'm thinkin' about you all the time
But you're out there
And I'm here waiting

And I, wrote this letter, in my head
Cuz' so many things were left unsaid
But now you're gone
And I can't think straight

This could be, the one last chance, to make you understand, yeah

I'd do anything
Just to hold you in my arms
To try to make you laugh
Somehow I can't put you in the past
I'd do anything
Just to fall asleep with you
Will you remember me?
Cuz' I know I won't forget you

Together we, broke all the rules
Dreamin' of droppin' out of school
And leave this place
To never come back

So now, maybe after, all these years
And if you miss me have no fear
I'll be here
And I'll be waitin'

This could be, the one last chance, to make you understand
And I just can't let you leave me once again, yeah

I'd do anything
Just to hold you in my arms
To try to make you laugh
Somehow I can't put you in the past
I'd do anything
Just to fall asleep with you
Will you remember me?
Cuz' I know I won't forget you

I close my eyes
And all I see is you
I close my eyesI try to sleep, I can't forget you
Nanana, nanana
And I'd do anything for you
Nanana,nanananaaaa

I'd do anything
Just to hold you in my arms
To try to make you laugh
Somehow I can't put you in the past
I'd do anything
Just to fall asleep with you
To fall asleep with you
With you, yeah
I'd do anythingTo fall asleep with you
I'd do anything
There's nothing I won't do
I'd do anything
To fall asleep with you
I'd do anything
Cuz' I know, I won't forget you

2005-10-30T20:00:00.000-05:00

If love made sense
Then I think there would be a book
To tell us who is really right and wrong
But I don't want something simple
I don't want to sing a normal song

***excerpt from "read my mind" - sweetbox

Ufair

2005-10-01T23:21:00.000-04:00

sooo chillz 2dai =) woke up at 9 to meet sam at fv. shopped around, nothing interesting cept for these fall seasons of clothing. not bad at all, cept they're pricey so i'll come bak for it later or ebay it sumhow. went back to my house to chill til lionel showed up. hadta help him deal w/ his shit all morning but itz aite. talked so much smack in the car it wuz jokez. went to pick up jon and kenny at jon's richass house. lionel wuz goin crazy around his neighbourhood cuz itz so rich =P. ripped the 401 trying to get to Ufair asap. picked up jen in DT while at a red light, so jokez. alwayz picking up frendz in the weirdiest ways. went to Ufair n bumped into so many ppl! pca, mdhs, mhs, uhs, bro andre, pet, lam, dmci, etc peepz =) got quite a few info which i hope to be useful even though the ppl we talk to weren't that much help =.= left late afternoon to chill at pmall/market with sam,jon,kenny. pho at midland/steeles and home after. just the night i needed to relax from this week's stress from school and all. seeing sam, bumping into peepz, eating, talking smack. good day =)

procrastination

2005-09-27T19:28:00.000-04:00

It's only been the first month of school and i'm already starting to procrastinate. i've been so tired everyday coming home and napping for hours that when i wake up i don't wanna do work. not a great way to start off school considering i didnt horrible on my calc quiz and there's a test this thursday. i guess i complain too much but i shouldn't. my work load is nothing compared to others who take sciences and other courses. but damn, university next yr already. and this whole accountability thing in bible class. im not liking it right now. it's interesting to sit on the sidelines and here bits of info here and there for the past few days. no comment but from observation im glad that there are mature responsible ppl =) Ufair this weekend! didnt get much out of last yrs but for sure making it best out of it this time. today was so jokes but that's another story. lionel welcome to gr12 soon =)

Happy Birthday Jen

2005-09-25T18:43:00.000-04:00

happy swt 16 jen. you're old now, just like us. cept we're turning 17 or 18 w/in this school year. glad we were able to make your strangest night your bday night. let's see, it started off with earl bales. kawai and i were team captains and i almost lost my voice cheering all morning. afternoon tim and i fell asleep in lionel's car..as wrong as that sounds =.= then off to chill after til dinner time @ jap buffet. bill came to lik $374.29..went to Ant's to chill. got home around 1 thanks to ian. let's see, next day woke up around 3 cuz lionel calls =.= din @ fmp, came home and rot til i slept. sunday slept in and rot again. now i gotta hwk cuz ive been so lazy. ugh im already sick of hwk and it's only the beginning of the school year.

that's a wrap

2005-09-05T15:00:00.000-04:00

summer has officially ended for me because school starts tomorrow. this summer has been quite interesting, good and bad. i dont want school to start, but i have no choice...last year of HS. i guess to sum up my summer, here's what happened:

-late night chillouts @ peepz houses and places
- helping jones pack
- saying goodbye to the Jones' @ airport
- msn and phone with jones
-BBN - derek,stan,kawai,jon
-walk-by drive thru @ mc'ds =)
-3 jap buffets in a week
-everyday pooling
- ss world issues @ milliken
-seeing samantha everyday @ ss
-ass getting numb every class at tutor
-taking lionel's car
-passing my g2 easily
-new mui katie
-wiggling at jitz
- hotpots, kbbq, jap, pho, mc'ds
-hours of crusing with lionel
-seeing lionel everyday in early aug =-seeing kawai everyday in mid aug =-new cellphone
-shots of Southern Comfort and Sprite..mmmmm =)
-1 month living at justin'z house
-bbt almost everynite @ cuzin's house
-movies - fantastic 4, batman begins, 4 brothers, longest yard, wedding crashers, war of the worlds, charlie chocolate factory
-late night phone convos
-strained and better friendships
-getting fatter
-toned lower body from blading
-obsession with XL pho
-bday parties
-STS all of august
-shopping sprees
-tons of walking
-poker
-drinking
-driving
-MJ with poker XD
-chillin w/ pca peepz less and more outsiders
-walkin from empress to home =\
-sleepovas

that's a wrap of 05 summer

sing for the moment.

2005-09-03T12:12:00.000-04:00

on my own - hedley

Stayed awake all night toss and turnin’
Now my blood shot eyes are burnin'
Workin' now why this ain’t workin'
Fight after fight after fight
And now it’s killin' me
You were too busy to believe in
All the run away dreams I was dreamin'
Time to pack up and go I’m leavin'
Fight after fight after fight
And now I gotta be
On My Own
And living in a world alone
Gets better every day
That I don’t have to say I’m sorry I’m coming home
I’m gonna make it on my own
I’ll always take the harder road
Gets better every day
That I don’t have to say I’m sorry I’m coming home
How’d you end up oh so jaded
Cynical and so sedated
Can’t live in this world you created
Day after day after day
And now I gotta be
On My Own
And living in a world alone
Gets better every day
That I don’t have to say I’m sorry I’m coming home
I’m gonna make it on my own
I’ll always take the harder road
Gets better every day
That I don’t have to say I’m sorry I’m coming home
You will always be the lonely one
You will always try to swallow the Sun
Just remember you could never make it rain on anyone
On my own
And living in a world alone
Gets better every day
Cause I don’t have to say
And now your killin' me
On My Own
And living in a world alone
Gets better every day
That I don’t have to say I’m sorry I’m coming home
I’m gonna make it on my own
I’ll always take the harder road
Gets better every day
That I don’t have to say I’m sorry I’m coming home
I’ll make it on my own
I’m sorry I won’t be coming home
I’ll make it on my own
I’m sorry I won’t be coming home
I’ll make it on my own
I’m sorry I won’t be coming home
I’ll make it on my own
I’m sorry I won’t be coming home

great song =)

friendship

2005-08-26T00:36:00.000-04:00

- the quality or condition of being friends.
ha. friendship is so fuked up. i dont know what to say about it no more other than it's two sided. there's hardly anyone to trust these days. people come and go and dun give a fuck about you. one day they're your friend, or so you thought, and the next they dont talk to you or think about you for days, weeks, or months. i put friendship before myself and in turn i get shit. half of you fucking people can just leave. don't need false faces and lies from you. there's times i wish i never knew you. promises broken and shit happens. at least do a better job of faking it. to those who still stood around when tough times came along and you were there, thanks. (you ppl know who you are) i wish there were more of you in my life. call you ppl up anytime to chill or talk and you'd be there asap. you give a fuck about my shit life and bother to check up on me. thanks once again. for every one person who cares about you, 10 more people hate you. you can't have everyone loving you. so please don't fake being a friend if you don't want to. it's better to be straight up then lie your way to me. to those who care, thx again and to others, fuck off or do better.

warm heart

2005-08-23T23:55:00.000-04:00

so i started out with a boring day as usual. had calc class for 3hrs. but when i got home i was so surprised who msg me, mrs.jones! it was great talking with her and katie. today was katie's bday and she turned 3. jones wasnt around but i did manage to webcam w/ mrs.jones n katie for a bit. it felt great talking with them and it sucked how i didnt call them once since they moved when i know i shuld have. they're doing great down there. jones has a job and from what mrs.jones has told me his job is very fulfulling and a new way to look at life with the ppl he's surrounded by. can't wait to talk to jones again. after talking with mrs.jones i realized how much i miss them. such a good family and a cute child. hope road trip works out well this fall to see them again. so tim's back from hk! that kid, 1st thing he does comin bak is phone gf n see her the next day. fag =P what happened to dicks b4 chicks? oh wells at least he brought me bak stuff, thx. 2nite i went 2 princess of wales theatre to watch that play...the legend of kungfu. it was good. so intense and stuff. ppl breakin metal on their foreheads, doin backflips w/ their head, n a bunch of nice martial arts move. thx to ma cousin's grandma who invited me. seats were lik $75each =\ crazy..overall today was good.

G2 BABY!

2005-08-23T01:07:00.000-04:00

so ive finally passed another rites of passage...my g2. so easy. all i hadta do was uphill park, 3 point turn, n back in parking. onli messed up on 2 minor stuff. glad i didnt hav da black lady everyone was telling me about. but anyways after that i met up w/ kim @ BV to discuss grad trip. stinky lionel didnt show up til lik 2hrs later!! OMG u fathorse...so kim drove us 2 my house, and she didnt know how to go back out =P. afterwards a very random night, we went to play badminton @ brebeuf with kiwi,lionel,ivan. fun night but apparently we're not allowed to come bak next week bcuz someone didn't pay or sumthing. after we went 2 mc'ds outside my house for dinner. funny thing is, we didnt have enough money for 3 mcdeals. we thought the total was $12.81 so we thought we were short 81cents so we asked some random group of azn guys inside for 80cents. some guy gav us $1 n wen we ordered we found out the cost to be lik $13.71....so we were lik fuk..and then da lady told us to just get small fries n small drinks isntead..so we did n we wer eshort 8cents instead...n i had only 3 cents left..so we asked the guys again for 5cents XD..so ghetto =.= n den we got kicked out @ 11pm cuz mc'd closes there so we were outside sttin @ da benches freezing our asses off. but we kept drinking our cold drink bcuz we didnt wanna waste it =P. then we went 2 ma house n chilled for a bit til they left. overall day was awkward but very glad that i have my G2 b4 school starts.

feeling the weight

2005-08-20T22:09:00.000-04:00

it's been a long time since i had jap food and today i pigged out as usual. omg i was about to puke and couldnt get up. cost was good though! $21 overall w/ everything lik tax n tips. the interior design was nice at this jap place @ pmall. i recommend =) . got up today at 7am to have driving lessons and then calc class from 9-12. waited for fat jon to finish his class n had XL pho w/ him n kenny. drove to mix2 and got my ass owned today by david. exhausted as hell today. 2 weeks of summer left now =( this sux. at least G2 is this monday. nervous yet excited...very odd feelings. anyways, i need a job to replenish the money that i blew this summer. guess ill havta get off my lazy ass and look around for fall jobs.

thunderstorm!

2005-08-19T19:45:00.000-04:00

hrmm not much to report today but rot at home today =.= was suppose to go to wonderland today but SO glad i didnt go. started hailing and crap in the afternoon. 3 leaks in the house...sounded like pee. on top of that i had plans to go to mix2 tonight. guess that wont be happening with the horrid traffic outside. apparently jen called and said fv was flooding. glad iw asn't there with you and how come i wasn't invited? fag. neywaiz, another day wasted in the summer. and now i would like to share i poem that got me thinking.

I Love The Word Impossible

It's like joy after sorrow.
People being friends after being enemies
Rainbows after drenching rain.
A wound healed
Sunsets on quiet evenings after
Hot noisy days.
Paralyzed, injured limbs learning to grow
Strong and useful again.
Forgiveness after wrong
Truth after fog.
New love-made babies. B
irds learning to fly and own the sky
Bitterness turned to mellowness
Fresh, genuine hope .. once abandoned
People finding each other at right moments
In unexpected, obscure places ..
For Go-ordained reasons.

I love the word impossible because my God believes
In adventure
And extraordinary mountains
And he dares to be alive in a world
Crawling with terrible situations
He promises to be bigger than any impossibility
Because He is love ..
And love always finds a way through, in time.

hot pot

2005-08-18T01:01:00.000-04:00

today was a boring day until night time. havent hotpot in a long time but it was good tonight. went to mix2 with ryan,kawai,chak,kevin,heng. got owned by kawai lik twice bcuz i kept gettin my cue ball in and not calling the right pockets. i thought i was a fatass all along, but now i know the truth, kevin is a fatass! at hotpot omg, we ate for 2.5hrs and we ordered AT LEAST 25 plates of beef. kevin ate so much beef, you whore! we were so hungry that we waited from 9-10 for the midnight special @ rollingpot for $9.99. overall fun night. cant wait to have my car so we can go to other places more often. this is what summer nights are all about; chilling w/ peepz and laughin ur ass off =)

summer

2005-08-17T02:51:00.000-04:00

hmmm summer's gone by alright so far. good seeing you people over the summer just chillin,drinkin,bball,ss,badminton,eating. havent blogged in a long time. time for a change of layout. spiritual life has gone down the drain. you know what song iz amazing? Collide - Howie Days

The dawn is breaking
A light shining through
You're barely waking
And I'm tangled up in you
Yeah

I'm open, you're closed
Where I follow, you'll go
I worry I won't see your face
Light up again

Even the best fall down sometimes
Even the wrong words seem to rhyme
Out of the doubt that fills my mind
I somehow find
You and I collide

I'm quiet you know
You make a first impression
I've found I'm scared to know I'm always on your mind

Even the best fall down sometimes
Even the stars refuse to shine
Out of the back you fall in time
I somehow find
You and I collide

Even the best fall down sometimes
Even the wrong words seem to ryhme
Out of the doubt that fills your mind
You finally find
You and I collide

You finally find
You and I collide
You finally find
You and I collide

3 weeks of summer left. enjoy while it last =]

bbq 06

2005-06-10T01:05:00.000-04:00

FIRST OFF, THANK YOU TO ALL OF YOU FOR COMING!!! this wuldnt hav happened without all of u, your supports and help. itz been a longggg day n im pooped =.= but here i am at 1am blogging n havent showered yet =\ 2 weeks of planning of gettin u ppl to signup, paying, buying food and supplies, and getting the bbq. we made this happen gr.11 =D what a night to remember.

HIGHLIGHTS:
preparing food
jones walking into the door being surprised
watching derek and andrew spar
bbq'ing and EATING
sprinklers gettin every1 wet
worship
bonding time
andy pointing at me with the most dramatic expression saying "AHHHHHH!!!!" wen it turned out to b a spider =.=
watching the sky
fireworks
bonding with ppl
kim goin on a pic frenzy n huggin every1 n saying sappy stuff

what a feast! chicken wings, steaks, ribs, hotdogs, hamburgers, caesar salad, garlic bread, nachos n dips, drinks, icecream! piggggs..all good. itz wuz worth it all the hassle, planning, spendings..just for this 1 evening, this 1 special moment in our lives where we will never 4get. jones, wow that man has all touched our lives individually. we cant thank him enough for what he's done and words cannot express our gratitude. all we can do now is thank Dad for blessing us for knowing him. who knos, maybe just maybe we stay out of touch w/ him. but as he said, 10 years from now when we bump into him at an airport, he will ask us, "r u living a life for God?" i truly hope i can say yes to him. food was great, location wuz awesome, music n ppl were great, i heard worship wuz gud too but i wuznt there for it cuz i wuz out gettin the marshmellows. i wish the whole grade could have come. 2dai wuz a day of reflection and thankfulness for the past years of knowings jones. where else other than pca can you bond with a teacher like him who understands us and guide us. he's left our school a flame that's small but it's going to be something huge one day. just wait and see. i use to hate pca for the longest time, but now im proud of bein a pca'er. thank you all..and now for my shoutouts:

***no particular order***

dani n helen - thx for comin early this morning to prepare the food n keeping mrs.jonez n katie entertained. appreciated it so much!!! im sure u guyz did a lot of work in the kitchen b4 i showed up and again for just keeping things in check. awesome job

lionellll - guy we did it. last night i told u that 2dai wuz going to b unforgetable. we made it happen even with lack of time and especially money. we spent way more than we thought, but man was it worth it. money can be replaced but this day cannot, and im thankful i spent it on today than on myself. im blessed having a great friend as you. we helped motivated each other n to plan this thing. truly blessed!

kawai,benson,stan,toria - thx for helping with the bbq'ing!!! haha my eyes were lik burning from the smoke for so longgg. thx for sacrificing ur time to just help out, make the food happen, n keeping the party going. u guys did an awesome job with the bbq'ing. thx for goin out of ur way to make others happy. toria thx for doing the marshmellows n a few small stuff here and there.

luka,nadine,tim,derek - thx for cleaning up!! that job was definitely messy! i hate washing dishes n thank you so much for washing them luka and nadine. tim n derek thx for doing the cleaning outside. it wuz such a dirty job. pickin up bones from chicken wings n other dropped food n stuff wuz gross. appreciate it!

alf,jacob,ant - thx for helping out here and there with the small stuff. esp jake for hosting the bbq at ur house. i didnt kno u were selling ur house til 2dai XD. thx alot! i hope we left it clean enough to be sold. alf thx for helpin with shoving the bbq yesterday n ant for uhh..cutting 2 garlic breads? i dunno i wuznt there but im sure u helped =] thx again.

sam,john kim, bri - thx for bringin guitars and doing worship i think? i wuznt there for worship but im sure all da guitars were used at somepoint =] we needed music talents n u were there to do it. thx again.

to whoever else i missed: thx for all ur help n encouragements. it meant alot and is given bak to u fully =].

1 more year ppl n we're outta here. excited, sad, frustrated, angry, anxious is not come close to the feeling of leaving pca. we'll have another class celebration again one day. off to bed =)

life

2005-06-06T18:02:00.000-04:00

Life can seem ungrateful and not always kind.
Life can pull at your heartstrings and play with your mind...
Life can be blissful and happy and free...
Life can put beauty in the things that you see...
Life can place challenges right at your feet...
Life can make good of the hardships we meet...
Life can overwhelm you and make your head spin...
Life can reward those determined to win...
Life can be hurtful and not always fair...
Life can surround you with people who care...
Life clearly does offer its Up and its Downs...
Life's days can bring you both smiles and frowns...
Life teaches us to take the good with the bad...
Life is a mixture of happy and sad...

So...

Take the Life that you have and give it your best...
Think positive, be happy let God do the rest...
Take the challenges that life has laid at your feet...
Take pride and be thankful for each one you meet...
To yourself give forgiveness if you stumble and fall...
Take each day that is dealt you and give it your all...
Take the love that you're given and return it with care...
Have faith that when needed it will always be there...
Take time to find the beauty in the things that you see...
Take life's simple pleasures let them set your heart free...
The idea here is simply to even the score...
As you are met and faced with Life's Tug of War

wow...love this poem. thank God summers here, but 2 more exams =] . have broken relationships to fix n things to settle with God. taking it one step at a time.

quote of the day

2005-05-05T00:04:00.000-04:00

"you're ready to have a girlfriend when you're satisfied enough in God to not need a gurl to fill in that hole that's in your heart"

Powerful words, hard to achieve, but willing to give God all that i have. i still miss her so much, but ive been reminded of God's awesomeness. Im giving it all to Him. His plan is perfect and far better than mine. God i trust you.

the journey continues

2005-05-02T23:48:00.000-04:00

Dad, you give and take away. "Blessed Be Your Name - you give and take away..." as retreat has already passed, some ppl r still on a spiritual high, others r already out of it. but wut we all share in common now iz dat Satan iz alreadi tryin 2 tempt us n destroy wut we have. peepz, dont giv up. fight the good fight =] im prayin for all of you. stan, heidi, kawai, andy, dan wang, awadalla, lily, rach, alf, val, deb, luka, kim, jake, ant, lionel, curt,jones n whoever else iz struggling in their life rit now. whether itz future university/careers, frendship, relationships w/ bf/gf/family/peepz/God, overwhelmed w/ expectations/skewl/life in general - NOTHING IS TOO BIG FOR GOD TO HANDLE. u have to giv it all to Him so He can help you. lean on Him ppl. praying for u all.

retreat 2005

2005-04-29T22:22:00.000-04:00

indescribable! thatz all i got to say. Dad's blessed me throughout this whole retreat. i dunno where to begin...i guess ill do wut tim did in his xanga =P haha..ma bad for biting...hmm..
DAY 1

i didnt kno wut 2 expect on the first day. already wen i got 2 skewl i 4got 2 bring my sleeping bag =.=! so i hadta call mom to bring it for me...n i overpacked..as usual. i realli wuznt looking forward to this retreat a whole lot. but i did my best to b cheerful about it cuz i didnt want those who were pumped for it feel bad. after we loaded all da stuff on da buses, i wuz on da committee bus along w/ da rest of every1z luggage. we had our brief devo n talk w/ our group n heidi took great initiative talkin w/ us. we all gav each other encouragements, thoughts n goals for this retreat n plans to come for our future. lookin bak at our 14 ppl group, i must say that most of our goals hav been accomplished. they're long term goals, but itz a start. the bus wuz so cramped but it wuz all gud. we pigged out on karen n luka's food. hehe thx =] wen we got there it wuz all damp n stuff...so i wuz all =.= cuz my mood follows the weather. but after we all got settled in n had lunch n then free time. i wuz quite overwhelmed w/ all the game planning that wuz to happen but thx to deb, heidi, jerome, jacob, n da rest of u that helped out for survival and capture the flag. i culdnt hav done it w/out you ppl. there wuz so much preparation n we didnt hav much. thx for givin up ur free time to help out. after freetime n stuff we had our first worship n session n i must say, worship wuz HOT! praise team, u did it all for the glory of God n u did it. i didnt kno if worship wuz gonna go well cuz i just had a feeling, but wow am i glad my feeling wuz wrong. it rocked! i sorta fell asleep a lil bit during Ted's first session >< his topic about depression hit me the most. i wuz lik wow, thatz exactli how i act! Ted had alot of enthusiasm n zeal in wut he said. he wuz so humble wen he prayed for us each time. he wuld go on his knees n pray. it just showed how much respect he gave to Dad. after session it wuz dinner n it wuz pretti gud. i think it wuz baked potatoe n all that. deb gav me hers ^^ thx =] . n afta we had freetime n 2nd session..dun exactli remember it cuz i kept having so much on my mind about da game n stuff. i promised that i wuldnt overwhelm myself w/ it. but i guess i did. my fault. lionel hadta keep nudging me n draw on my hand to wake me up =P. thx lionel! after session there wuz a brief break b4 we began our first game which wuz survival. i sucked at explaining but thx to jacob n deb for helpin me explaining the rest. for the most part, every1 understood the game n played it. there were a few that just kept complaining n got on my nerves. me n ma cousin were the viruses who threw volleyballs at ppl. fun fun =] n then carmichael n jones took the waterguns n were hunters. sorri rach n curt, i didnt kno they took the guns. it wuznt my plan. n den after da game wuz done, i took da water gun n shot carmichael from behind n anthony's head n jacob's butt. n den kim wanted me to get jacob, but i didnt n shot her instead. muahaha, luv ya kim =P. after we had snack n then our last game which wuz capture the flag at night. that game didnt go so well cuz alot of ppl didnt wanna participate. quite a few played ball at da bak wen they werent suppose to. so mani complaints i got n i wuz realli frustrated. n im so sorri deb for yelling at u durin that game cuz iunno if it wuz me or u that made da mistake for placing the blue team in da middle section. but ye i hope i didnt hurt ur feelings. after capture the flag n every1 wuz super dirty from falling from both games, we all headed to our cabins to sleep. iunno wut happened but i just broke up n cried so much. i wuz sitting at da steps of da porch of our cabin just crying. i felt so hopeless. even til now im not exactli sure y i wuz crying but i think u wuz just overwhelmed w/ da sins i had, overreacting to ppl during the games, n a few other issues. but wen i looked up at da sky w/ all da stars, the song "indescridable" came to my mind. a line from the song wuz "u placed the stars in the sky and u know them by name". it wuz so powerful, i culd see God's power n i wuz struggling to giv it all to him n let his plans to proceed. i wuz selfish. carmichael n jones walked by n asked if i wuz okay. thx u 2 for just asking. it meant alot. curt, thx for bein there. i pushed every1 away wen they tried to help, but u were the one that just kept pushing me n even thou i didnt nudge much, u prayed for me outloud. a thousand words cant describe how thankful i wuz for that. after lik 1/2hr of just sitting out n crying, i went inside, ate w/ peepz we had a long devo n talk in our cabin. we all sat around on our bunkbeds in our room n had devo. we gav each other encouragements n words of affirmation to each of us. simon,kawai,joey,james,tim,andrew k, andrew lee,sam,curt,jerome,benson. thx all of you. i kno im not tight w/ all of you, but wut we shared that night, ill never forget. it wuz lik mexico n grad 8 ottawa trip all over again! it wuz so real. where else can we hav such a strong support group n b able to do something lik that? not alot of places n im thankful. after our 1hr devo some of us continued to stay up n talk about diff topics. stuff lik God's greatness, his powers, heaven n hell, n dating. thx curt,sam,kawai,tim,andrew for staying w/ me n talking.

DAY 2

woke up at 6:30!!! omg curt, dun ever wake me up so earli again. i hadta in order to take a shower. n da shower hurt! cuz da nozzle wuz messed up so da water came out concentrated instead of drizzling, but wtv. it wuz so cold in da morning too, cuz jones turned off the heat wen we slept. shivers >< i still can feel the coldness. we had breakfast n it wuznt that great, but i wuz thankful cuz i wuz hungry. after we had scanvenger, but b4 it started we had 1/2hr to prepare. while every1 else wuz inside for the couch game, jerome,luka,deb,heidi,tim,val n whoever else i missed out im sorry..but they all helped to set everything up. the game sorta went according to plan. i didnt havta yell which im thankful cuz i lost my voice almost. unfortunately not everything wuz placed properly, but i guess most ppl had a gud time doing it. i 4got which team 1, but i think it wuz ruth's group. gj peepz. we had session 2 after n this time i realli fell asleep >< i had my shades on but i guess it didnt realli fool ney1. lionel hadta keep waking me up again. shona kept taking my fuzzy peaches, but iz all gud, i still got so much left over. after session n worship we had lunch n den tons of free time n den session again. after that we had dinner n night activity. it wuz TNL (thursday night live). our group, we sang n it totalli messed up! i 4got the tune n we were sang all quiet n stuff. i think we got last place. but thx for leading lionel. u took initiative. stan thx for putting up w/ our singing n attempting to sing. i kno u hate singin n stuff but im glad u gav an effort to participate. after TNL we had a brief break n it wuz time for making smores!! it wuz a competition amogst our brother/sister cabins. WE WON! we made our smores to make it look lik carmichael's face. graham crackers as his face, chocolate icing as hair n moustache, n tiny white marshmellows for teeths i guess, or wuz it lips..i dun remember. some1 sed it looked lik mario but i dun think it did. haha. afterwards we had oasis! it wuz so powerful. again, praiseteam, great job. u out did urselves n all for the glory of God. we had a sharing time, but instead of da traditional open mic, we all sat in a huge circle n passed the mic along n talked if wanted to share. quite a few ppl opened up n it wuz very personal n touching. i didnt exactli cry but i did hav watery eyez cuz it wuz so touching. just being so open n vulnerable cuz honestli ney1 culda laughed or sed something. but im glad we hav a support group that supported whoever spoke from their heart. there'll b some things that ppl shared that i havent experienced b4 or mite not ever, but whether i hav or havent experienced it, i understand n iz praying for u ppl. afterwards we had worship again, but this time it wuz diff. the whole place wuz dark except for the stage, we all spaced ourself out arms length. we tried to stay away from our frendz n try 2 b around diff ppl. for the first time, i cried my eyes out while singing at top of my lungs. i did crack at timez n wuz pumped. i realli meant the words that i sang. i didnt realize just how much the words that r part of the worship songs are so powerful. words lik forever, always, n a bunch more. if we realli think about those words n then referring them to Dad n stuff, itz indescribable. we sang: all about you, surrender, indescribable, consuming fire, how great is our God, in the secret, hungry, did you feel the mountains, my God n plenty more. didnt realli matter what song we sang, they were all amazing. wen the worship team didnt sing but the instruments were playing still, u culd realli feel the passion that wuz coming from the ppl that were singing. we were singing loud, proclaiming God's glory. some were on fire, others were pumped n others were still struggling w/ God. however ppl responded that night, we were all moved in some kinda way. After 11, every1 clearned out of the sanctuary except for the gr11s. we sat in a circle along w/ jones n carmichael, n we just had another sharing time. this time more personal. thank you n im so proud of all u who shared. itz difficult n hard. but i understand. there were some ppl who i thought were the last ppl that wuld open up to share. i wuz lik woah, if they even open themselves up, God really moved us in this retreat. there's no way you can deny that the holy spirit iz not real, that christianity iznt real. jones..omg hez leaving. wut he said to us, for what it's worth, im so glad he said it. he talked to us about priorities in our lives n how we need to figure out what realli iz imp n stuff. im gonna miss him so much. he'z 1 of da few ppl that has impacted me, n da fact dat hez a teacher iz even more meaningful. how mani teachers can u actualli talk w/ at skewl n b gud frendz with. itz rare these dayz. Dad, u brought jones into our lives for a reason n w/out him over these past few years, who knos what culda happened to some of us. but again, thx for bringing him into our lives. you give and take away Lord. there's a higher calling for him and i understand. i cant express how much im going to miss him >< ...neywaiz..after over an hr of sharing it wuz lik almost 1..but some who stayed longer, we worshiped, prayed, talked w/ ppl to mend broken frendships, n play instruments. i talked w/ a few ppl n u kno who u r. thx for everything. u ppl mean the world to me. i stood outside on da porch for a gud hr overall just staring at the stars. "indescribable" kept coming to my head n tons of other songs. they just kept flooding n i just kept singin them. i wanted to reach up to the stars w/ my hand and move them. it just showed how great God is. i wuz able to share that moment w/ a few frendz. it wuznt til around lik 3ish did we all went bak 2 our cabins. even after that a few of us stayed up another hr to talk.

DAY 3

bummed out. ging tired. onli lik 4hrs of sleep. i skipped breakfast cuz i wuz too sleepy. onli me n james in our cabin skipped breakfast to sleep in our cabin. n it wuz so cold again >< but i got over it n i just snacked on da food dat we had for breakfast. we all started packing once every1 got bak n thx to kawai n sam for helping me gettin my stupid sleeping gear into the bag. it wuz almost impossible. morning worship practice i stayed around n it felt gud. wen worship did start shortly after, i wuz standing beside john kim, n we worshipped together. it wuz amazing. i kno im not tight w/ u john, but that moment i will never 4get. u hav an amazing voice. we shuld sing more often. haha. stan, thx for standing beside me too, it meant alot. after worship we had ted giv us our final message in a huge circle, bcuz we put the chairs away the other nite for oasis. after his message, we had 1 final worship. we poured our hearts out bcuz we knew it wu zgonna b da last retreat n worship us gr11 will hav at pca >< it's sad, but itz time to grow up n prepare ourselves for reality. after we had lunch n freetime to pack. n then we left jackson's point at 2:15. sighz..i miss the place already.

WOW! WHAT A LONG BLOG. haha sorri for those who actualli read da whole thing. musta took u forever. i've learned so much durin this retreat. for me the main focus wuz prioritizing my life n accepting God's plans that he has already put forth in my life. i didnt accept them at first, but i do now. sharon, i still miss u so much. that last nite staring at the stars reminded me of u alot too. cuz i kno how much u love stars. i wanted to share that blissful moment w/ you. im now fully understanding y we culdnt b 2getha. who knos, maybe in the future it wuld b da right time. but wtv happens from here, u'll alwayz b a great frend n im so thankful for havin u in my life once again. there's so much thanking i havta do...where to begin

Kawai: bro u've been there w/ me through the gud n bad times. u've stuck around n experienced the best n da worst of timez. thx fo much. known u since gr4 n we've been great frendz since then. i kno we've had our differences in da past n it torn us apart for awhile, but itz been building bak to what we once had. we havent talked too much this year, but i'll alwayz hav ur back. cuz itz so smal..jkzjkz..stay strong for God. i kno u've got alot of things happenin in ur life. u've got great frendz n no matter what happens we'll b there w/ u every step of the way.

Tim: man ur so hot omg. haha..seeing u grow this retreat has been great. itz my first time seeing ur passion for God. after the first nite u wanted to join the worship team, guy im proud of ya! u dont sing bad at all. we've grown tighter this year n itz been a gud journey. alwayz will b great frendz.

Curt: ur awesome. thatz all i gotta say. there's not enough words to describe my thx n appreciation for u. God has realli worked in ur life n u've continued to let him work in ur life. dun giv up. ur prayer for me n words of encouragement iz the best thing u can ever do for some1 lik me. thx for everything.

Andrew lee: ur beyond sexy. haha...we had our gay moments. but wow, what a true Christian. u talk the talk n walk the walk. true warrior for God n a passionate christian. how mani drum sticks did u break again during worship? lik 7? crazy yo. but who carez, it wuz all for God. u've given me words of encouragement n i tahnk u for them. continue growing in Christ n living a life for him. ur a true frend.

Sam: sammooo! H-O-T. haha how mani timez hav we said that word to u this year? itz nutz. ur another true frend lik andy. itz onli these past years in high school dat ive gotten to kno u better, we're alwayz stuck in da same classes for the most part n thatz how i got to kno u better. ur such a great example of a christian. u giv me hope n strength to follow Christ when times r tough. but seriousli, stop doin so well in school =.= itz depressing...haha

Jerome: sexxxy!!! haha. itz been a long road w/ u since gr7. we've had our differences over da past few yearz. but thx for bein there wen times were tough for me. again, i cant describe how thankful i am to hav u in my life. ur a great guitarist. continue to do what u do for God.

Joey: joeeyyyyyyyyy...we shulda spooned u. haha jokez. guy ur so funny. ive gotten to know u a bit this year n from what ive seen ur a good frend too. alwayz sticking beside whoever needz help. but ur so lazy omg. u wanna bring me some "mut jing" during media artz class =P i didnt hav much of an opportunity to talk w/ u during the retreat but wtv happens, im alwayz here 4 ya. u can count on me =]

Deb: great planning! used all ur brain powers =P thx for putting up w/ my crap n temper at timez during the retreat. u've been a great frend too. this year i dunno wut happened, but we drifted lik mad. last year it wuz great but iunno...i hope we can continue to build our frendship once more. the retreat wuldnt hav been the same w/out u n heidi. i'll alwayz be here for u wenever u need it =]

Heidi: heidi had a little lamb little lamb...haha. that still bugs u up to this day. you realli let God work through you this retreat n throughout the planning. ur a leader!! u stepped outside of ur comfort zone n did it for God. amazing talent n leadership. what a passion for God. ur an inspiration for us all. continue to live a life for God. alot of things that u've sed to us i will never forget. words of encouragement, pep talks, and reminders. one word that describes who u r right now to me iz "inspiration".

Lionel: BIGGZ! guy u've stuck w/ me throughout this year. thx for everything. tru frend. all da harassing n name calling. all jokez. ur such a deep thinker n another great leader. i cant wait to see what God has in store for you. all the words of encouragement n bein there through the gud n bad timez i will never forget. im glad we're tighter n got to kno u alot more this year. we've both done stupid things, but we've alwayz stood by each other through tough times n sacrificing time. continue to build a passion for God.

Kim: sorry for reacting harshly if i did to u yesterdai. i wuz overwhelmed w/ stuff. but thx for undertsanding. seeing u bein so honest n wanting to know God more this retreat also continues to inspire me. u got a gud singing voice. dun giv up. build a foundation for God, otherwise we'll fall hard, real hard. all the spares we hav together this year made me get to kno u more. ur an awesome frend. thx for bein there for me.

Karen: haha my lui =P jokez. ur so whiny! as mrs. lee said.hahah...ur so daai too..thx for being there for me. ur so funny yet so stupid =P haha..i love u. ur sharing n honesty wuz great. proud of ya. dun giv up on Dad. he'z got so much more in store for you if u continue to let him take over ur life. ill alwayz b here for ya.

Stan: stanley tweetle...haha where'z that from? ive been calling u that all retreat, but i dunno wherez it from. if ney1 knos, let me know. got to kno u so much more this year, itz been great. ur so jokez. i didnt talk w/ u too much during da retreat but i saw u around looking confused n sad. i hope things r starting to workout between u n that person. ur a gud frend. just see'ing u worship on fri morning beside me wuz so powerful. all the happy n sad times we had ill alwayz cherish forever. ur a great advice giver. thx for everything man.

im sorry if i 4got any1. ive typed way too much on this post. but if i 4got u, plz let me kno n ill b glad to add u. thank you every1 for making this retreat workout so well. it surpassed my expectations! if any of u need a shoulder to lean on, mine iz alwayz here. it might b a bit high but ill bend down. God has touched us all n im sure alot of us r on a spiritual high, but dont walk away from this retreat n 4get about wut we had. this iz so real. we need to build a foundation after this. just wut philip said, our spiritual life will onli b as strong as our foundation. fellowship w/ one another, hav a personal relationship God, devotions n prayer life iz so important. dun expect a huge change after this retreat n not do neything afterwards. trust me, ive been there. it sucks. cuz u fall ever harder n almost impossible to get out of spiritual low. Dad, thx for opening my eyes this retreat and making me see my wrongs n priorities. we've onli begun to kno ur greatness. the word i wuld describe this year'z retreat iz "indescribable". we're in reality people, letz show the world what God can do! proclaim Jesus iz real.

change

2005-04-22T00:04:00.000-04:00

wow havent blogged in almost a month. way too lazi now to blog. no time n stuff. so much has changed in this past month, good and bad. but what i'll miss most of all is sharon. it's only been a short while, but she's impacted my life in so many ways. cant express how grateful n happy i am that you brought her bak into my life again Dad. i dunno wuz ur plan for us to only b frendz or what. but what i do kno is that whatever happens from here, i kno u have the best plan for us. meybe we'll cross paths again and this will all b a temporary thing. we'll look bak at it n laugh 1 day. or maybe we'll never cross paths but b there side by side as great frendz n bro/sis in Christ to continue to help each other wen we stumble. we all struggle. n right now we're struggling to have a healthy relationship with you Dad. help us to continue to do that. as hard as it is to let go of this rit now, i kno itz for the best. i still miss u n care so much still for you share. but i hope that whatever happens from here, we'll continue to have a positive outlook n stay great frendz. for those who r goin on missions trip this sat, hav fun! glad ur doing Dad's will. u'll have a blast n ill miss u guyz. i wuz glad that crouse wuz gone..but since we got nanos now =.= arg i dun lik her..neywaiz...jap buffet 2nite wuz great..stomache ache after thou..oh wellz..thx again for another blessed day Dad.

comp stuff

2005-04-01T11:20:00.000-05:00

click here for comp stuff

gettin fatter...

2005-03-27T01:41:00.000-05:00

hey Daddy!!! i havent blogged here in awhile...woohoo first time since easter holiday..muhaha..thx for makin my day gud overall =D=D another blessed day again ^^ gud weather, gud frendz, gud moments, gud food, gud timez!! =] muahhaha..wut culd i ask for more? well there iz..but they're unnecessary..w00t..got up so earli 2dai thou =.= @ lik...9!! to meet up w/ jackie @ subway to bus to museum station to meet up w/ sharon'z mom n bro to go 2 ROM..sillie jackie we got off @ spadina instead...backtracked 1 subway stop..sighz..mommy i wont follow u next time on da subway =P ROM SO BORING!!!!!!!!! i mean itz lik interesting n stuff...but itz just not me...n wow...jackie n share crawlin through that thingy underneath the display..sighz..=P haha..but i guess it wuz aite there..learned a few stuff..not dat ill never use my knowledge of wut i learned ever..unless im lik on some TV show or sumthin...haha..den we wandered around eatonssssss...forced share to resist from shoppin for sweatpants haha...so tired walkin around....yawn* n den we subway to fv to watch pacifier!! SOO GUD!! HAHAHAH...gud disney movie..baby so cute too..."mister, why do you hav boobs? do you need a bra? will my boobs be as big as yours wen i grow up?" HAHAHA!!! stupid share n jackie den sed i hav boobs too =.=...I SO DONT...if i did..i'd b extra fat..itz those fat ppl dat hav fat on their chest dat makes it saggy!!! ewww >< neywaiz...den we wandered around FV n stuff....had lik 3 hrs to kill!! so we got to finch/warden plaza earli..went 2 dis lik netcafe for lik 40min....did nothin on it...stupid realplayer wuldnt play russell peters vids =.=.....grr...den went 2 kbbq w/ sharez peepz..all gud..pigged out n got fat again!! ting wuz feelin sick!! i hope shez okay..she wuz lik all pale n lik wuz basicalli stripping..=P i wuz be'in odd again..and MICHAEL LI CAME!!! mannnn he musta been bored yo!! all he did wuz eat a lil...n listen to his MD..MIKE TALK MORE!!!! hahaa...all gud...we annoyed the snot out of the waiters..w/ my rude "EM GOIIIII!!!!!!!" translation..."excuse me!"...and our massive change wen we gav tips for the bill..hahhaa...also went on a PIC frenzy durin din too...cept lily did most of da work..i wuz too busy be'in a BAD CHEF =] muahah..i hope u all hav food poisoning 2nite! n den later...we went bbt @ 168 ...JACKIE CAME THEN!! and no..we're not gay.....haha..pissed off the waittress there too =P all of us were be'in loud n obnoxious..itz in our blood!! den slowly every1 started leaving by 11pm =P vw drove me home =] haha miss dat guy..havent chilled w/ him for ages...n now im here..all wasted n tired..got insurance class tomorrow n den gonna go pick up russell peters ticketz to his gig in apr...havent even realli started hwk yet!! sighz..help me Dad..u've given me quite a relaxing day from hwk..thx for everything...but now itz time to adjust bak to reality...thx for sending ur Son to die for our sins..no1 asked u to, but u did..n derz nothin we can do to pay u bak...we're so not worthy of ur awesomeness! but ur also a loving Father, and for that we can have eternal life ^^ as this easter holiday iz alreadi 1/2 done, plz keep us all reminded of the true meanign of easter...n not b bombarded with the north american culture of easter...bunnies..easter eggs..etc...help us b more grateful for wut we hav now...ask for things that we NEED and not WANT...tomorrow dani,rach fung, n helen gettin baptized..thx for blessing them n kept watch over them..as their symbol of faith to show that they are true warriors for you and loves you so much..that they'll continue to be an example to the rest of the world, to believers and non-believers...helpin each of us grow =] thx again Dad.

fun day =]

2005-03-19T00:40:00.000-05:00

sup Dad,
another great day 2dai...cept a bit tiring =P chilled w/ sharon all dai =] haha i havent done dat for lik weeks...sighz i miss her alreadi Dad. thx for keeping her safe..aside from her bruises =P but ye...woke up at 10!! even thou i got home at lik LATE LAST NITE >< went 2 eaton @ 11:30 w/ ting,sharon,nathan...chilled for lik an hr there..had no money to buy stuff =( silly sharon got a cut sumhow @ jacob connextions wen she wuz tryin on stuff..so i took her to shoppers n got spongebob bandaids for her =P so jokez XD haha n me n nathan went through sharonz sling bag while she wuz changin n we found some unusal stuff dat we didnt fig we'd find =P haha..sorri share XD den we wandered around on yonge st for lik 1hr...SO COLD!!!!!!! >< but occasional sunshine =] haha..den we subway bak 2 ma house...n i fell asleep on da subway n im glad i didnt drool on sharon =P haha...if i did dat dat wulda been odd n embarassing XD ma neck hurt wen i woke up cuz i wuz leanin on the right side of her back =P n den we watched "daai lo oi mai lai"itz lik ma 5th time watching it!!! ahha sharon u shulda played hexic at ma house..n sam thought it wuz me talkin w/ her on msn dat time =P she thought u were on ma account @ her house =P haha...n den i walked share to subway n walked bak..on ma way bak da ttc bus drove by fast n the huge puddle of water ALMOST splashed me Dad..thx for keeping me safe..i wuz an inch away from gettin drenched! den went home n slept til 9pm =P haha..3hrs ^^ doin hwk since then ...thx for everythin 2dai Dad..quite a relaxing dai ^^ i pray taht u'll continue 2 watch over kiwi's dad n ma frendz n i as we still got lotz of hwk 2 do =P thx again Dad ^_________^

hotpott.....

2005-03-18T01:50:00.001-05:00

sup Dad,
thx for making this day a relaxing day =] just hadta get away from all the work n cramming for the past few dayz...hmm wut'd i do 2dai..got a haircut dis morning..sighz..it came out ugli..i told the guy..i wanna get it thinner and just at tad bit shorter...*PFFOOMM!* 10min later im bak to short spiked hair again =.= why God? =P haha..iz aite..den i went 2 eat lunch w/ mom @ sum chink fastfood across starwalk..den went 2 nofrills..N I 4GOT TO GET THE BOX OF DIAPERS THAT WE BOUGHT FOR MY BROTHER..lik..we paid for it n all at the cash register..but i 4got to load it onto the cart..HOW DA HECK DO U 4GET SUMTHIN LIK THAT..ITZ BIG TOO! OMG!! im soo dumb..den we went 2 pmall to look at some belts that ma mom wanted...lil came n tagged along w/ us..den lil came bak home w/ us...n i saw samantha for lik...2min at ma house cuz she had ortho =] miss ma lil sis =( den i showed lil russelle peters video...so jokez! XD..later lionel had da car 4 da day n came to pick us up..we went 2 pca w/ jerome,buchnea,lionel,lil,me..n we watched buchnea giv a hugeee haircut to lionelz ugly hair..cuz he dyed it goldish brown..n hes a brown man..so ye..hez lik bald now =] den we went 2 fv..basicalli did jack there for lik an hr..wandering around lik idiots...buchnea wuz trying 2 find deals @ champs or athletes on tees..just lik in the states..doesnt work that way in canada david =P den lionel dropped me,lil,buchnea @ pmall....1st time davidz been to pmall...it wuz so funni...he lik freaked out ...all these azn everywhere..nothin gud to look around for him..so i took him to izone..n we all lik cs n chilled for lik an hr til lionel returned w/ his car...den we went din w/ jonez,philip,jon,2 of his frendz,lil,lionel,david,me @ rolling pot!! they also include free softdrinks...pretti interesting c'in pplz reaction to eating hotpot =P so jokez...n den ye...lionel just dropped me off @ home around 11:30 =] thx for da ride man..musta been alot of gas used up all dai =\..oh wellz..i spotted u $20 @ dinner..u owe me twice in a row now =P haha...thx again Dad for making this day quite relaxing..had a gud time..i pray dat u'll continue to keep watch over me for the rest of da week as i cram all ma skewl work n still manage to maintain daily devos n going out w/ peepz..gnitez Dad.

worry...

2005-03-16T15:02:00.000-05:00

itz crunch time...assignments,hwk,isp,test/quizzes..gl to every1..wenever ur stressed..think about this verse.

Matthew 6:34 - Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

march break...

2005-03-16T00:37:00.000-05:00

hey Dad,
woahhhh i finalli blog..itz been ages..haha..ye right..iz it just me or did march break go by fast and wuznt that fun? we got so much work n stuff to worry about wen we go bak 2 skewl..so much for march break..quite disappointed in myself lateli..i wuz hoping that march break wuld help clear my mind..get bak in shape..improve in some areas of life..n get work done..did i?!?! NOOOOOOO...felt lik such a failure =( itz funni how we alwayz say we dun wanna procrastinate over breaks..we'll get all our work done asap..so we can hav fun on da last week..didnt happen for me this time..now im cramming..n panicing..sighz..God i need ur help..help me to rely on u more..hmmmm letz see wut i've done durin the break so far...
1 - blindfolded annie n got rach to come along to help pick a perfume out for anniez bdai gift
2 - visit sharon @ skewl
3 - work a bit
4 - sleptover at cousins house for 2 nitez
5- hotpot w/ peepz
6 - kbbq w/ peepz
7 - malling..but no movies =\
8 - plan retreat @ pca
9 - debate on issues w/ self...(soundz kinda odd =\)
10 - chillin w/ some other peepz
11 - skiing w/ jackie n snowboarding w/ sharon n other peepz
wow..dat wuznt alot..but thanks alot Dad for making those happen...wow..derz still so mani things i wanna do b4 march break iz over!!! go see a movie, chill w/ samantha n lil, see sharon, get all ma work done, exercise to stay fit, hotpot w/ jonez n peepz, see mich, go see jon'z tree IN his house =], n tonsssss more...haha..guess onli lik 1/2 of those will happen..oh wellz ...nothin i can do...lateli ive been strugglin w/ frendship God...ye i kno im a teen n itz so hard to figure out my place on earth..sumtimez i dunno who ma frendz r...but itz gettin better thank God..if ur reading this kim, i forgiv u =] i kno u didnt meant to honestly and im sorri i made u cry..u shuldnt hav had to..i shulda been more understandin as a frend..i didnt do my part as a frend right away n im sorri for that =] ..dun worri..we'll hav more "deep talks" in spare..haha..u'll alwayz b my spare buddy..been growing tighter w/ some frendz n drifting w/ others..sighz..lifez not fair sumtimez..devos been goin down the drain...alwayz come up w/ excuses that i never hav the time to do it..but i guess if i hav the time to talk on msn for hrs..then i hav the time..Dad help me b obedient...help me change my attitude..dun let me fall short of expectations..help my weaknesses b my strength..my swearing has been goin up again...funni how i totalli contradicted myself last nite @ kbbq wen i told ppl to stop cussing =P lionel u kno wut im talkin about haha...still got a long road ahead of me w/ tons of twists n turns...but ill alwayz remember that whatever u throw at me Dad, u kno that i can handle it =] ... i wont let u down..ill make u proud that im ur son n da world will soon c it too...i pray that u'll help look over ma family cuz we got some family issues..pray that u'll comfort ma frendz dat r going through rough times...the world's leaders that they'll make the right decision on behalf of the countries...it sux that we messed up ur perfect world Dad..but we've realized wut we've done wrong n i thank you ur a forgiving Dad..u've seen and heard it all..pray that u'll continue to help sharon n i w/ our devos n our spiritual journey cuz dis aint an easy task either..i pray that we will continually b reminded of u n ur blessings that u've given n that we'll leave everything to you..even wen we're selfish n we dun wanna let go of what we have..but we kno that u kno wutz best n dat we'll continue 2 lean on u for guidance =] thx for everythin Dad...as march break iz comin to a close i pray that u'll help us all finish our work diligently n get as much as we can out of this break. gnitez Dad.

auto show!!

2005-02-27T12:50:00.000-05:00

autoshow was great yesterday Daddy!!! thx so much for makin the day a good one =] finalli got 2 chill w/ jon..n even w/ vw n ting..hehe..stupid ting hadta do wut sharon told her 2 do =.= grrrr shez so mean =P haha..but thx for puttin sharon in my life =P saw sooo mani ging cars there!!! carrerra GT!!! wowwwwwwww thatz hottt!!!! n the beamers n porscheeeeeeee w000000t!!! haha...ill find sometime to upload the pics durin march break!! took a few pics of jon n stuff...got 2 sit in the G35,escalade ELT,bmw 530xIT n 525xi!! sexxxxxxi hehe...even bumped into jamez n his frendz too =] haha best of all..found an acura RSX poster lyin in one of the paper garbage bin..it wuz mint condition too...wut r the odds of that =P so chinese of me to take it =P i didnt see ney1 else w/ 1 @ the autoshow so i feel special =] ahaah..i hope dri iz doin okay now...she wuz cryin on fri n i pray that u'll continue 2 comfort her =] but sadly yesterdai i couldnt control my tongue...i swore sooooo much >< i havent sworn lik that in a longgg time >< feels lik all my discipline went to waste..but im not too discouraged...im still learning =] thx for be'in patient w/ me..i pray taht u'll help us all get through the rest of the week cuz we got alot of test/proj due b4 march break =] giv us strength n endurance to get through them all to the best of our ability. neywaiz, i got hwk to do =( ill talk w/ u later dis afternoon =].

report cardsss....

2005-02-25T22:49:00.000-05:00

hey Dad, thx for watchin over me again =] everythin went alright 2dai...meybe not the BEST that i wanted..but enough that im not complainin about =] hehe...got my report card 2dai...not the best..but i excepted worse but it wuznt..althou i dropped by 4..n ma marks were alright...i deserve it thou...i didnt try hard so i hav nothin 2 complain about...glad that im still in the 80s..itz time 2 actually start tryin more...grad iz comin up faster than it realli iz...scary..but il make it =]...den afta skewl chak n ryan came =]..havent seen them in lik monthsssssss.....we stayed to watch "battle of the bands"..it wuz alrite...not the greatest..but dey did put alot of effort into it n it wuz a gud show..few laughs here n there...n den dri wuz cryin 2dai =( dunno why Dad..i pray u'll comfort her n dat she'll come to u for help...then we went 2 hot pot after around lik 6ish....but kiwi n joey didnt go =( n timz sick now ><. i hope hez alright now..so it ended up only ryan,chak,me goin to hot pot..but iz alright..it wuz alright food w/ descent price..all u can eat for $11.99 ..BLOATED NOW..hehe..gettin fat now..the conversations we had durin dinner wuz amazing!!!! we talked about religion in general..lik roman catholism, judaism, christainty, and muslims...i never imagined i'd b using infos ive memorized from WR in a reg convo..but i did...haha!! how great iz that...then i got 2 drive home afta dinner wen ma mom came 2 pick me up..hehe..it wuz funn..drivin in the snow =P thx again for such a relaxin day, besides the report card =P i hope my rentz wont get too mad at me wen i show my rc afta autoshow..neywaiz..ill talk w/ u later @ devo time =]

what a day...

2005-02-24T21:37:00.000-05:00

hey Daddy,
how u been doin up there? it's so great how u can oversee everything that's goin on around u...u want the best for ur children n im sure it must hurt wen u see them fall...as much as u want to help them, u kno itz for the better =]...but wen those who need help right away..u help them...how great is that..i wish i culd help my friends around me who r hurt and confused...but there's not much i can do..there's only prayer =] and i continue to put my trust in u even wen i can see the light at the end of the tunnel sumtimez...i got a peak at my report card 2dai Dad =] jones helped me n kim durin our spare. im not too pleased w/ my marks..i thought i'd do worse, but not AS bad..but still bad..i kno i shuld start trying..slackin off n priorities not straight still..i shuld b doin everythin for you and u deserve the best of me n lately im not..but datz all part of learnin n i thank u for lettin me go and catchin me bak =] the next 2 weeks will b tough..especially w/ skewl stuff..but please continue to giv me strength to pull through b4 march break ^^ my daily devos hav slowly been improvin Dad =] it takez effort but i KNO it'll become a habit again as it once was b4. thx 4 sharon n helpin me out w/ my spiritual life. if it wuznt 4 her to giv me a nudge here and there, i wuldnt b where im at now =] we hav sooo much faith in u..neywaiz Dad, ill ttyl 2nite wen i do my devos..thx for everything.